How to Prevent Violence and Save Yourself
Street Safety Confrontation Management for Women
Nov 7, 2009
Whether it is a form of harassment or indirect threat of physical harm, it is never too early to know and adopt some personal safety strategies for dealing with an interaction that causes uneasiness and distress. In most cases, knowing how to handle such tough situations can prevent things from escalating into physical harm. In addition to these safety tips, one should always remember to stay alert of their environment and trust their own instincts.
Dare to Speak Up
When someone gets too close for comfort, whether at the office, in public or on a date, hold up one hand and tell them calmly but assertively that they need to back off. Forget being polite for the moment and just think for one’s own safety.
it is easier to avoid the whole confrontation and quickly excuse yourself from the interaction. However, avoidance usually allows the same thing to keep happening until the problems eventually worsen.
Make Eye Contact
If you suspect a person is up to no good, turn around to face the potential threat. It is not easy, but it is worth working up the courage to do it, even if it is just looking that person straight in the eye for a few seconds.
Additionally, some self-protection experts and law enforcement officers also recommend casually addressing a suspicious character. At the same time, take note of their stature, what they are wearing or carrying. If you suspect someone is following you at a secluded place like the parking lot or elevator, a simple comment about the weather or asking them for the time can also be a deterrent because it shows that you are aware of their presence and can identify them. Now that you have seen their face, they are more likely to dismiss you as a target.
Most attackers observe their targets, waiting for the right moment when the person’s guard is down, and then take their victims by surprise from behind. When one demonstrates obvious alertness, then an opportunity to strike is not presented. If that doesn’t do the trick, at least you will be prepared to respond if he does still attack.
Using Assertive Commands and Profanities
If you are being harassed in public, give stern commands to let the harasser know you do not appreciate it instead of pleading for them to stop.
If the harassment persist, forcefully yelling something along the lines of “Get the f*** out of here!” not only deters the harassment from escalating, but also draws attention to your situation and sends off a warning to a would-be attacker that you are willing to put up a fight if necessary. Personal security expert Paxton Quigley suggested this method of verbal self-defense from what she learned while interviewing convicts for her book Armed & Female that potential attackers do not expect to hear “some nice lady swearing”.
Admittedly, this is an offensive verbal self-defense method that most women might not be comfortable with. Quigley recommends doing ‘swearing drills’ alone at home before a mirror.
Resist, Never Comply
Attitude can make all the difference when it comes to self-protection. One should never passively comply when coerced into doing something, whether directly or indirectly, verbally or physically. Remain calm and under control, then look for an opening to do something that enables you to quickly escape from the situation.
Chris Harris, author of Complete Idiot’s Guide to Self-Defense agrees that while there has been a controversy over whether a woman should fight back or passively comply during any kind of assault, statistics are in favor of women who choose to fight back. He noted that when saving yourself, “do whatever it takes. Now is not the time to fight clean.”
Sources:
Complete Idiot’s Guide to Self-Defense by Chris Harris
Armed & Female by Paxton Quigley
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