Safety must begin with the individual. No amount of self-defense training and weapons can replace the real sense of empowerment that comes from within. It must start with self-worth; knowing and believing that you are worth protecting, and that no one should be allowed to violate your will and body. Only then, can a woman become self-reliant and implement any self-protection strategy she has learnt.
Martial Arts Training Doesn’t Really Work
Most traditional martial arts teach techniques that are only practical when fighting an opponent of the same discipline, under the watch of a referee and the restriction of rules. Not to mention, mastery of these techniques take a lot of time and commitment. Hence, they are not practically applicable in an unpredictable real-life situation.
Darren and Beth Laur, husband-and-wife authors of a number of self-defense books had the following to say about choosing effective self-defense classes: “The self-defense program should include simulated assaults, with a fully padded instructor in realistic rape and attack scenarios, to allow you to practice what you’ve learned.”
Mind Your Body Language
Criminals prey on people they perceive as weak and easy to overpower. They pick out their potential victims by first observing a target’s body language; primarily the way she speaks and carries herself. As approximately 90 percent of communication is nonverbal, body language can easily override spoken words in others’ perception of oneself.
Take an objective self-assessment by observing one’s own way of speech, posture, habitual gestures and dressing. How do you think you come across to other people? Do you maintain an upright and confident posture or do you walk with hunched shoulders and head cast down? When you speak, do you project authority by maintaining eye contact or do you avert your eyes? When you sit, do you fill your chair or ‘draw’ yourself in?
The Way You Dress and Personal Safety
It is still a prevailing myth in certain societies that a woman can ‘invite’ an assault, particularly sexual assault, by dressing provocatively. While the subject is still debated among experts, it is still not a bad idea to look at the clothes one normally wears.
The way you dress does send subliminal messages about you the same way people form impressions of others based on what they wear. Restrictive clothing and heeled shoes can make it difficult for one to flee or fight back, which potential assailants might take as a cue. Hence, everyone should try to find the perfect balance between personal style and safety that works for them individually.
Anger is the Best Weapon
In the August 1977 issue of Black Belt magazine, karate instructor Py Bateman provided a valuable piece of advice to women that still rings true today: “The spirit and determination to defend ourselves should be stronger than a rapist's will to dominate. So the first basic item of self-defense is a display of anger.”
The normal reaction when overcome by fear is to do as you are told and hope the ordeal will be over soon with minimal damage. However, the moment you do not put up resistance when threatened is the moment you ‘allowed’ yourself to be made a victim.
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